How to Avoid Relationship Issues?

Dear Friend,

Are you going through a storm in your relationship? Independent of whether you are married or in a path to get married, it is important to resolve the issues early. The bulk of the problems in the relationship arises due to the underlying misunderstanding in the meaning of words such as mutual attraction, lust, and love many times. Somehow we started thinking the meaning of all the three words is the same. Let's try to distinguish the difference between the three words.

The mutual attraction between males and females is very important. Without mutual attraction between two people, the relationship will not lead to marriage. The media and movies put much emphasis on the attraction between male and female. But the attractions play only a small part in initiating the relationship.

Lust creates an immense need for immediate satisfaction. Lust makes us jump over the fence, suppress the warning signals of the moral brain to attain something which is not ours. Our generation mixed the meaning of love and lust so closely and many started thinking that lust and love are one and the same.

What makes a solid foundation for marriage is love. But there is no love without sacrifice. The amount of sacrifice defines the depth of love. Each one in the family sacrifices themselves for the benefit of others in order to love each other. Sacrificing something for themselves is not love. Instead loves forces one to sacrifice for another person they love. Letting go of a hobby to spend time with wife and children is a sacrifice. God showed us what is greatest love is. He sacrificed his own son Jesus on the cross to show the true meaning of love.

Please sit down and think through what is driving your relationship. Is it love, mutual attraction, or lust?

Lets look at some of the root causes relationship issues:

Who owns what:

In marriage, both wife and husband own everything with equal rights. There should be clear financial transparency between them. When there is no financial transparency, it leads to doubts about each other’s lifestyle. Dear friend, if you are hiding something from your spouse right now, please reconcile and make it transparent. This is not going to help your family relationship.

Avoid Doubts:

Avoid doubts in marriage at any cost. Please make sure your spouse does not doubt you at any point in time. Even if the reason for the doubt is your close friend, for the sake of the relationship try to avoid the friendship. Marriage is more important than friendship. Your spouse's happiness decides your family's happiness. God brought you and your spouse together as one body.

Runaway from Secret addiction:

Let your life be as transparent as possible with your spouse. Many write to us about their secret addictions in betting, pornography, extramarital relationships, and other secret additions. The secret addictions will destroy the marriage. Addictions will always come to light one day or the other. All secret addictions are preset time bombs and it will explode one day. Once the secrets explode a person will be only left with shame and guilt. Please run away from all the addictions. Jesus can forgive your past and wash you with His precious blood. He can give a new life. If you need counseling or medical help please approach your local experts.

Avoid Ego:

Some bring their positions and authority from office to home. They expect to be respected by their wife and children. Husband and wife need to leave their ego at the office. Dear friend, you may be a famous personality, the most respected member of the community. But at home you are still a father, mother, husband, or wife. Nothing more and nothing less. Your position outside the home does not decide your position insider your home.

Remember who brought you together?

It is always God who brings husband and wife together. There is an old say, Marriages are made in heaven. God did establish marriage between husband and wife. God himself conducted the first marriage between Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. He found it was not good for man to live alone. Hence God found a companion for Adam. The institution of marriage was established by God himself. Is it right for individuals to walk away from what God has established without his consensus? Bible says, Let no man separate what God has united.

Wait for God's Guidance

If you are not married, please seek God's guidance for your marriage. Seek His perfect will. God knows who is the right match for your life. Pray for His will and guidance. He will bring a right person into your life. You will not regret allowing God to make a choice for you. 

Remember Your Vow:

Marriage vow could be different in different cultures and religions. But the underlying meaning is the same. Here is the sample.

I, ____, take you, ____, to be my (husband/wife). I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.

Dear Friend, Are you ready to commit your life for your spouse in ups and down till death separates?

The marriage vow is very similar to the vow God made to man. God says, "Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you.". God's love never changes over time. It does not change based on the situation. God expects the same in our marriage.

Dear Friend, Are you struggling in your relationship? Is your relationship breaking down? Are you in the midst of a storm? God is listening to your prayers right now. He knows your tears and sorrows. Hold on to Him. He can mend your relationship. Please listen to his voice. God will surely answer your prayers. He will give you peace and comfort for your broken heart. He can fix your problems in the relationship.

Place your hand on your chest and believe Jesus can change your marriage problems. We are going to pray. Jesus is going to help you. Let's pray. If possible do the prayer along with your spouse.

Prayer

Dear God, I come to you. You know why I landed upon this web page. You know my past life and the storm I am going through right now. Jesus, I want to talk to you. Heal my relationship. Make me right. Soften my heart and wash me with your precious blood. I know I have made mistakes in the past. Please forgive me. Fill my heart with your love. Please heal my relationship. Bond my family together. Take away all the selfishness. Lead me and guide me. Sharpen my ears to listen to your gentle voice right now. In Jesus's name, I pray.

Dear Friend, God surely listened to your prayer. He will answer every one of your prayer points. Do not worry. May God bless you and make you a blessing for many.

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